Tag Archives: life

To Be Real

Dear friend,

I have to tell you something.

I have been so impatient. I am impatient.  And my impatience instills fear that I will be left behind, left out, and be nothing in this World.  And my fear then transpires into stress and judgement, which then causes me to rush everything.  And in this giant rush and push to hurry up life, I leave you behind. I leave you out.  And, I actually really am nothing when I am pushing to be someone tomorrow, not today.   I am just so impatient.

And as I sit here writing this, I realize I have a question for you.

If I slow down and chill out.  If I can see what is in front of me, when I see you in front of me and love, love, love.  If I listen.  If I believe harder.  If I stumble and fall.  If I radically fail.  If I allow space and time to be space and time.  If I stop proving and stop speaking so loudly over others.  If I stop complaining and start creating.

Will you, will you wait for me

Please wait for me.

Dear World, will you wait for me?

 

Wait, Alexi Murdoch

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Filed under Love, Present

Believe Harder

I woke up this morning in Maui.

I wish you were here.

Yes, you.

The sweet smell of salt air and the sound of crashing waves sneak in the open windows.  I am surrounded by a Canadian tribe of radical people up to really big, amazing lives rocking human impact.  And, I have a bit of a hangover due to over-celebration of an uber athlete of a friend crushing her goals and rocking the Ironman World Championship in Kona.

It is a beautiful life.

And, I have a hard time believing this is my life, that I deserve this, that I am really here.

Believe harder, I tell myself.

Believe harder and own these moments of absolute gratitude, love and joy to be alive.  So alive.

Believe harder so you can stop asking if it is really real and actually be in the present moment.

Believe harder and know that you attract and you choose this life.  Own it.  Be it. Rock it.

Wow.

I so wish you were here.

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Filed under Goals, Gratitude, Present

Show Me the Way

Life points you in the right direction.

If, any only if, you let it.

We meddle,

we settle,

we avoid and talk over.

Yet, this life will point you in the right direction,

If you listen,

are open to the risk,

are willing to see the possibility.

If, and only if, you let it.

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Filed under Possibility, Present

Dear Self, Just For Tonite

Dear Self,

Just for tonite, don’t turn on the computer.

Just for tonite, don’t waste minutes, turned into hours on a social network that is not your life.

Just for tonite, celebrate you.  Love you.  Be you.

Just for tonite, turn off the TV.  Silence the iPhone.

Go to the corner store, buy a cider beer and toast to nothing and toast to everything.

Because this is it.  This is your life.

Celebrate.  Create.  Vibrate.  Eminate.

Compassion.

Just for tonite, don’t waste minutes, turned into hours on a social network that is not your life.

Get off line.  To get above the line.  And be you.

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Filed under Happiness, Possibility, Present

Let’s Feel It, For Real

I met a woman who sold jewelry a couple month’s ago in San Diego.  She was quite lovely, decked in pristine white and adorned with necklaces and heavy bangel bracelets in a tasteful way.

She sat down next to me on a couch and we chatted away, as some strangers find they can do quite easily with one another.  She told me:  “the World is scared to have feelings these days.  Everyone is scared to be mad or sad and just wants to try to be positive all the time.  We are like mannequins.  Boring.  People are allowed and should be able to feel every emotion and know that it is okay, you know, to just feel”.

I pondered this opinion for a bit, as I looked at my hard-pressed glass is half full approach.

I realize that I often judge myself (okay, and others) when I am mad or sad for too long.  I want to tell myself to snap out of it, be happy already.  Be happy now, right now.  Be thankful and find joy in each moment.  And that sounds really nice.  However, am I pushing down and bottling up emotions that can be shared, felt or really released?

Her words were such a beautiful reminder to myself to truly feel every emotion.  Know the depths of anger, passion, sadness, fear, joy, deep belly laughter and love.  Know them well, so that you can make the choice to shift.

And, I wanted to remind you to be okay to have a shit day, a messy moment or an all out breakthrough.  Cry in front of someone, furrow your brow and huff and puff a bit.  Feel the emotions.  And, rock out an overjoyous occasion or deep belly laughter, be in the moment where you literally jump up and down or run to hug someone and knock them clear over.

Let’s feel it, for real.  Until we fall over laughing, crying, jumping or sobbing. 

I’m over the mannequin crap, too.

Let’s be alive.

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Filed under Adventures, Present

What Do You Do?

I am in the midst of creating business cards that are really life cards.

So, not necessarily my 9am-5pm business life on a card, but the “what I am up to with my big, amazing life” card.

That way, when we meet one evening at a party and you shake my hand and ask the question that we always ask to keep the conversation alive and engaging, “Nice to meet you.  (pause)  So, what do you do?”

I can hand you a life card and say, “Oh me?  I am the Mad Hatter“.

Here is how the back of the card I hand you will read:

Boom.

I cannot wait to meet you!  What will your big, amazing life card read?

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Filed under Adventures, Goals, Possibility

I See You

I have listened to Alexi Murdoch’s “Orange Sky” song probably over 437 times since I first heard his mellow jams in 2009. Different stages of my life chapters have allowed for this particular song to have different meanings:

I remember playing this song on repeat out of my stereo in bed with my boyfriend (long distance at the time) when he would come to visit me from Chicago to LA. It was a love song for love.

I remember crying in yoga class when the song played, feeling deeply moved on the mat for a reason unknown. It was a love song for the love of myself.

And, I always love when he speaks about the sister standing by – because I have sisters and they stand by. A love song for family love.

My absolute favorite part of the song is when it picks up at about the 4:13 marker and he sings:

Here is what I know now, Brother

Here is what I know now, Sister, goes like this:

In your love,

my salvation lies In your love,

my salvation lies In your love,

my salvation lies In your love,

my salvation lies In your love,

my salvation lies In your love,

my salvation lies In your love,

my salvation lies In your love,

in your love,

in your love

your love, now.

Going deep, hang tight with me, people. Because in this life chapter right now, the love song is to you.

Listening to the song this evening, I feel a jolt and connect and re-align to my deeply rooted life purpose. I realize that my salvation, my favorite and most self-expressed experiences, my ability to do less and be more, the light-my-amazing-life-on-fire-feel-so-alive moments, are in the conversations with you… with you creating a life you love. When you, yes you, love yourself. When you connect and align to the most real and truest heart space. When you dare to step outside of your comfort zone and make a choice to reach way out, rock hard and set your amazing life on fire. And, when you love yourself enough to create something radical and realize that when you do, you are of most service to the World.

I see you.

You inspire me.

And, I boldly wanted to let you know, that in your love, my salvation lies in your love. In your love. In your love. Now.

So, carry on and create a life you love.

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Filed under Happiness, Love, Self Love