Tag Archives: friends

Surround Yourself with People Who…

with people who inspire you.

with people who challenge the sh*t out of you.

with people who radically love you.

with people who create space in your life.

with people who make you smile, laugh, feel really good.

with people who support you.

with people who are honest.  Always honest.

 

And then, you be that person for them.

This one, I am for real.  #choice

 

Similar post:  the R.S.V.P., Create Space, Hashtag Honesty

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Filed under Adventures, Happiness, Present

Wharton Wednesdays: The Misconception about Friend-Dating

Guest Blog Series written by my dear friend, an epic graphic designer and a rad chic in my life book,  Caitlin Wharton.  Featured every Wednesday for Wharton Wednesdays!  Read on and enjoy about a girl on her quest to find her tribe:

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Wednesday already?

After last week’s kick in the ass gentle reminder, I launched my patoot deep into the friend scene.

Week 2 approach: Ballsy Nightclub-esque Pick Up Lines

If best-friend searching was a dating game, then my friends, I am a bachelor on the prowl. I polish up my whitest-laced Chuck Taylors and flip through a thesaurus before launching into pick up lines in the most no bullsh*tty kind of way.

Hey Brian, I’d love to teach you about typefaces… your place or mine?

Tess. We must hang out. Immediately. (well, like soon. I think you’re really exceptionally awesome)

Steph – let’s beat the heat and search for beets or treats at the Farmer’s Market! Neat! (ok that one didn’t go down exactly like that… but close).

I even brought it home with a group invite for a badass night of crafting mayhem.  Let’s see what these new friends are really made of.

And guess what happened.

They.

All.

Said.

Yes.

I Farmer’s Marketed with Steph, I birthday partied with Dana, I MainStreet toodle-d with Jess, I wined and dined with Jess + Allison + Chad  + Josh, I lunched with Laura, I chatted fabrics with Wendy and I popped bubbly and geeked out on typefaces with Brian.  If there were more than seven days in a week, I’d have done even more.

Verdict

Friend-dating truthbomb #3
There’s a misconception about friend-dating and for some weird reason, nobody ever outright tosses cheesy one-liners. WHY NOT?  With the right charm (and badass knitting invitations)… it works. Like a freaking dream.

Here’s to another week of yoga dates, trail runs, gluten-free beers and throwing paint.

Tribe, you are looking mighty, mighty fine.

Your place, or mine?

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Filed under Adventures, Goals, Possibility

Wharton Wednesdays: TruthBombs

Guest Blog Series written by my dear friend, an epic graphic designer and a rad chic in my life book,  Caitlin Wharton.  Featured every Wednesday for Wharton Wednesdays! Read on and enjoy:

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I am back on the friend-dating scene, mi compadres.

Week in review

After last Wednesday’s post, something unexpected happened. I had friends texting me, replying to my want ad, saying things like ‘FINALLY’ and ‘I have been here for years and don’t have my tribe yet, either!’. I had outright down-on-one-knee proposals and friends setting me up with that cute blonde that they know saying we were ‘made for each other!’ To say I was floored would be a gross understatement.

 

Week 1 approach: Hard-to-get

Thursday rolls by and I nonchalantly add my new friends to Facebook, lazily hit reply to the messages and generally be an all-around jerky friend, waiting for my new friends to make the first move. Busy with freelance work (read: self-absorbed), and a new job (read: excuses!), I skate through the weekend and by Monday I realize I’ve put no effort into actually hanging out with these new remarkable human beings who, wait for it… WANT to be my friends.

 

Now it’s noon on Tuesday and I get invited to a beach-side BBQ by a co-worker who is throwing a party for her friends Amy and Trevor, in town for a wedding. For 1 full year, these totally awesome people lived on the same block as me, had a dog the same age as my pup, Oscar and we would strike up casual conversation and joke around daily as the dogs played together in the field. We’d grab the leashes and say see-ya-later. Then one day they said see ya long-later – they were moving to Ontario to start anew.

 

So naturally, we go to the BBQ and to no one’s surprise, we have so much fun getting to know our dog-park friends in a non-dog-park setting. My boyfriend Mike and I leave the BBQ and sitting at home we’re filled with a whole lotta “they’re-actually-really-awesome”’s and “i-wish-we-would-have-gotten-to-know-them-better’s”. One year of playing hard to get with the dog park neighbors? Yeah, doesn’t work in the world of friend-dating. Just like desk-side texting, and facebook-adding doesn’t work when you’re building your tribe.

 

Verdict

Friend-dating truthbomb #1

Put it out to the universe, baby! You, too, would be shocked to find out just how many people are looking.

 

Friend-dating truthbomb #2

Get off yo ass. Good friends aren’t hard to find. They’re all right under your little nose as you’re too busy throwing green tennis balls.

 

Dana, Tess, Alia – look out. You gals are next.  xo

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Filed under Adventures, Present

…and door knobs.

11:01am:  I walk into my yoga class one minute late today.  I am short of breath from the jog from the parking garage, rushing up the flight of stairs to the yoga space and slightly annoyed that I might be disrupting the beautiful beginning.  Yet, I am met with a warm greeting from a lovely teacher.  One of those, “I am so glad you are here” type greetings, that just allows you to feel amazing and forgives your tardy entrance.   I unroll my mat smiling.

1:03pm:  After class, I float to a nearby store and phone my amazing Mother.  We chat and as if we are shopping together, I send her pictures via text of a purse in two different patterns for her opinion.  Which one do I need?  She says, go spend your money on adventure and hit the thrift stores for something awesome. Great advice.   I walk out with only 2 new door knobs, smiling.

1:32pm:  I walk to my Vespa and I pull out of the parking garage, only to hear my name being greeted again by a radical man on his bike zooming by – oh snap, my yoga teacher of all teachers, my teacher trainer.  I absolutely love chance meetings with people I love!  I scoot the scooter over to the edge of the curb and he pulls his bike over and we chat for 27 minutes, sharing ideas and lives.  We part and I pull away to head home, smiling.

2:17pm  I unlock the door to my apartment and find the dog jumping, tail wagging and smiling up at me and my phone is ringing.  My sweet boyfriend checking up on me, I pick up and ask where he is.  He peeks out from behind the bathroom door.  Sneaky.  More smiling.

Yoga love.  Family wisdom.  Chance meetings with friends on bikes.  Dog smiles.  Hidden lovers.  And, Door Knobs.

Thank you to those who made me smile about the little things in life today.  Is this what being present feels like?

I say, when life makes you smile, smile back.

Smiling...

Now, you go be a smile for someone today!  You just never know…they might be writing about you right now….

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Filed under Gratitude, Happiness, Love

Life Lessons from Bridesmaids?

If you have about 4 minutes of life to spare, press play for a clip(s) from Bridesmaids when Megan acts out life to Annie and gives her the real deal life lessons:

Part I (2min, 22 sec):  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uNvn6EhSa4Y 

Part II (1minute, 57 sec):   http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lUbWIlgo4MU&feature=related

I shot off the couch when Megan said this line to Annie (see Part II):

“I do not associate with people that blame the World for their problems, because you are your problem and you are also your solution”

BOOM.  Take a moment to ponder that. 

Then, make a decision to stand for yourself or someone in your life – perhaps go be life and bite them in the ass (see Part I).  I mean it, that’s the real deal.  To my loved ones, dear friends, and friends I have yet to meet, I say always bite me in the ass if I throw a pity party and lose sight of my right to choice.  Got that?  An advanced thank you.

You are the one your life is waiting for.  So take some personal responsiblity and rock that sh*t!

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Create Space

I was perusing Twitter a couple of days ago and stumbled upon an absolutely beautiful tweet:

@ElenaBrowerSpend time with people who make more space in your life ~ not less

Read it again.

And again.

I realized that I had never considered the people in my life to be the space-makers.  Yet when I ponder the notion, I completely see it, I feel it.  I believe I have gone with the ‘quality over quantity’ route for close friends in my life.  My boyfriend would beg to differ as I speak about the line-up of people I dream to have on my side of the wedding line…but anyways. 

When I look at my close friends, it is true.  They make space in my life for possibility, dreams, love, fun, laughter, relaxation, health, passion, freedom, motivation…

And when I look a little deeper, my dearest of dear friends really allow more space … 

in

my

heart.

Like the Grinch, I love heart space.

Take a look at your friends.  Heart space?

If the answer is no – time for new friends.

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Filed under Happiness, Love, Possibility

Adventure: the Great-Life-with-Laughter Table

Well, last November I bought a dream kitchen table.  You know the picnic table style: stained and recycled wood, pull out benches, seats 6-8 people…big, wide, wooden beautiful.

I saw the table at the Melrose Trading Post, a must-go for all of you LA residents!  I ran my hand across the top and for a moment, I daydreamed of friends filling the table, wine glasses full, delicious food and laughter, so much laughter just pouring out of my open apartment windows.   I was in an apron and at the oven… *record scratch*… I am not a cook, much less own an apron!  Sigh, oh yes!  I have a boyfriend that is absolute magic in the kitchen – daydream record back on.  So, Chris by the oven and there I am, refilling wine glasses. chiming in on conversation and hosting.  It was a radical visual.

So yes, I might have broken the monthly budget with awful timing, approaching holiday travel and Christmas shopping, but I bought that “great-life-with-laughter” table.  It happened on the spot.

Now, all we needed was hungry friends to fill it!  Never mind that we really don’t even own a full set of wine glasses, or proper plate and bowls yet..that will come with time. 

So, this past week, our table runneth over.  Chris and I hosted a dinner party with friends and every spot was taken with an ottoman pulled up to the table’s end for extra seating.  #bliss

I turned around at one moment in the course of the evening with a wine bottle in my hand, laughter pouring from the table out the window, delicious smells coming from the oven that Chris was standing by and I just smiled.  Well, I smiled and then did a mild freak out  and chanted my excitement to our friends that our table was full for the very first time ever.  Friends laughed again. 

My daydream record had become a real life record.  It’s such a beautiful thing when that happens.  I say keep daydreaming and some times, you just have to jump, make the purchase and make life happen from there!

And, we even had a surprise birthday song that evening.  Oh, how I love the great-life-with-laughter table.

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Filed under Adventures, Gratitude, Happiness